more student papers...

Today's Topic: How to end a paragraph with a bang!

Okay, I know I should be grading these papers and I have been, but I must share. This isn't so much vadge-related as it is moron-related. Because this is another paper on the topic of dads and pregnancy hormones (still just a wee bit vadge-related), I thought I'd share a juicy passage that made me snort (really):

...however two of them did have the same cravings for food as there wives did. I asked them why they thought that was and they both think it had to do with the wife buying the mass amounts of sweets and leaving them around the house (first snort). Another possibility is that while the wife is eating for two the husband tends to eat equal amounts alongside his wife. Which we all know they can be very appealing once they've been placed in front of you, especially days at a time (the wives or the sweets?) There have been several studies that show this. (get ready) Certain colors and color combinations have shown to ignite the specific parts of the brain to trigger hunger. Which is the reason why McDonalds chose red and yellow to be on the exterior of their buildings.

There you have it, vaginas! I was pretty sure that someone would hit the jackpot with this essay and this fellow has. This is possibly the most brilliant non-sequitor that I have ever seen in a student paper.

p.s. Who even says "sweets" anymore???!